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Main
Date: 08 Feb 2009 23:56:34
From: Irish Mike
Subject: Poker Players Most Likely to Die in 2009
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Porsche Dan posted a link
(http://www.cinemablend.com/celebrity/The-100-Most-Likely-People-To-Die-In-2009-14401.html)
to the list of celebrities most likely to die in 2009. He mentioned that
Doyle Brunson is #16 on the list. Well I hope nothing happens to Doyle but
thought it would be interesting to list the poker players most likely to die
in 2009 and their cause of death:
Phil Helmuth - stabbed to death with an onion peeler by his psychiatrist
wife, who finally snapped.
Shieky Shekhan - shot to death by a good Samaritan.
Russ G. - sprayed to death by an Orkin technician who mistook him for a
giant cockroach.
Any one on your list?
Irish Mike
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Date: 09 Feb 2009 13:19:57
From: IHeartWuzzy
Subject: Re: Poker Players Most Likely to Die in 2009
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On Feb 8 2009 11:56 PM, Irish Mike wrote:
> Porsche Dan posted a link
>
(http://www.cinemablend.com/celebrity/The-100-Most-Likely-People-To-Die-In-2009-14401.html)
> to the list of celebrities most likely to die in 2009. He mentioned that
> Doyle Brunson is #16 on the list. Well I hope nothing happens to Doyle but
> thought it would be interesting to list the poker players most likely to die
> in 2009 and their cause of death:
>
> Phil Helmuth - stabbed to death with an onion peeler by his psychiatrist
> wife, who finally snapped.
>
> Shieky Shekhan - shot to death by a good Samaritan.
>
> Russ G. - sprayed to death by an Orkin technician who mistook him for a
> giant cockroach.
>
> Any one on your list?
>
> Irish Mike
David Sklansky: shot to death by Natalee Holloway, who finally escaped
from his basement.
Mike Matusow: death by intestinal bleeding, after a night of "pegging"
from an Olympic Gardens stripper.
Phil Gordon: strangled by Rafe Furst, after Phil threatened to go public
about their "relationship".
Daniel Negreanu: contract killing, after charrison hired JBK due to
"Canadian jealousy".
Antonio Esfandiari: poisoned by Jennifer Tilly, for being so goddamned
annoying.
Chris "Jesus" Ferguson: struck down by God, for being pickle's and his
son's imposter.
Aaron Bartley: heart attack, after losing his buy-in at the .50-1 PokerTek
tables.
Clonie Gowen: suffocation by Vanessa Selbst, after Clonie refused to "make
it rough on the muff".
Durrr: stabbed to death by Leonard Nimoy, as per William Shatner's orders.
Paul Popinjay: decapitation from Black Helicopter blade, while
simultaneously O.D.ing from a white widow/2-buck chuck/extenZe "cocktail".
(Paul's true Trifecta)
Irish Mike: death by internal bleeding, from repeatedly being kicked in
the balls by Malia and Sasha Obama.
_____________________________________________________________________
: the next generation of web-newsreaders : http://www.recgroups.com
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Date: 10 Feb 2009 01:11:06
From: Deadmoney Walking
Subject: Re: Poker Players Most Likely to Die in 2009
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On Feb 9, 7:49=A0pm, funky cold medina <kellywon...@yahoo.com > wrote:
> On Feb 9, 4:00=A0pm, "James L. Hankins" <jhanki...@cox.net> wrote:
>
> > "IHeartWuzzy" <a551...@webnntp.invalid> wrote in message
>
> > Daniel Negreanu: =A0He actually survives the contract killing, but succ=
umbs to
> > bad Mexican hair implants after growing weary of his combover.
>
> Jerry Yang, Doggy, and an unkown TVSM who turned 18 last week make it
> to the final three during one of Bellagio's Saturday afternoon
> tournaments.
>
> UTG, Jerry shoves his pocket 4s while raising his hands shouting -
> 'Praise the Lord! Show these philistines thy might and smite them baby
> Jesus~!"
>
> Doggy gleefully calls, and is even more excited when the young TVSM in
> the BB (who is the slight chip leader) calls also and turns over J3o.
> Doggy has AA. =A0Flop comes J33.
>
> Before the turn, Doggy goes into one of the most explicit tirades ever
> recorded in Casino history and croaks on the spot - reasons unknown.
> Yang, not even waiting for the hand to finish, runs over to the TVSM
> to tell him that 'he has a FRIEND FOR LIFE.' =A0But as he speaks a
> lightning bolt flashes down from heaven and strikes him dead also.
>
> A statue near the fountains is erected in their honor.
Scotty Nygyun: falls in a puddle and drowns from the weight of his
bling.
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Date: 09 Feb 2009 16:49:08
From: funky cold medina
Subject: Re: Poker Players Most Likely to Die in 2009
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On Feb 9, 4:00=A0pm, "James L. Hankins" <jhanki...@cox.net > wrote:
> "IHeartWuzzy" <a551...@webnntp.invalid> wrote in message
>
> Daniel Negreanu: =A0He actually survives the contract killing, but succum=
bs to
> bad Mexican hair implants after growing weary of his combover.
>
Jerry Yang, Doggy, and an unkown TVSM who turned 18 last week make it
to the final three during one of Bellagio's Saturday afternoon
tournaments.
UTG, Jerry shoves his pocket 4s while raising his hands shouting -
'Praise the Lord! Show these philistines thy might and smite them baby
Jesus~!"
Doggy gleefully calls, and is even more excited when the young TVSM in
the BB (who is the slight chip leader) calls also and turns over J3o.
Doggy has AA. Flop comes J33.
Before the turn, Doggy goes into one of the most explicit tirades ever
recorded in Casino history and croaks on the spot - reasons unknown.
Yang, not even waiting for the hand to finish, runs over to the TVSM
to tell him that 'he has a FRIEND FOR LIFE.' But as he speaks a
lightning bolt flashes down from heaven and strikes him dead also.
A statue near the fountains is erected in their honor.
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Date: 09 Feb 2009 18:00:08
From: James L. Hankins
Subject: Re: Poker Players Most Likely to Die in 2009
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"IHeartWuzzy" <a55120d@webnntp.invalid > wrote in message
news:t8j666xnq2.ln2@recgroups.com...
> On Feb 8 2009 11:56 PM, Irish Mike wrote:
>
>> Porsche Dan posted a link
>>
> (http://www.cinemablend.com/celebrity/The-100-Most-Likely-People-To-Die-In-2009-14401.html)
>> to the list of celebrities most likely to die in 2009. He mentioned that
>> Doyle Brunson is #16 on the list. Well I hope nothing happens to Doyle
>> but
>> thought it would be interesting to list the poker players most likely to
>> die
>> in 2009 and their cause of death:
>>
>> Phil Helmuth - stabbed to death with an onion peeler by his psychiatrist
>> wife, who finally snapped.
>>
>> Shieky Shekhan - shot to death by a good Samaritan.
>>
>> Russ G. - sprayed to death by an Orkin technician who mistook him for a
>> giant cockroach.
>>
>> Any one on your list?
>>
>> Irish Mike
>
>
> David Sklansky: shot to death by Natalee Holloway, who finally escaped
> from his basement.
>
> Mike Matusow: death by intestinal bleeding, after a night of "pegging"
> from an Olympic Gardens stripper.
>
> Phil Gordon: strangled by Rafe Furst, after Phil threatened to go public
> about their "relationship".
>
> Daniel Negreanu: contract killing, after charrison hired JBK due to
> "Canadian jealousy".
>
> Antonio Esfandiari: poisoned by Jennifer Tilly, for being so goddamned
> annoying.
>
> Chris "Jesus" Ferguson: struck down by God, for being pickle's and his
> son's imposter.
>
> Aaron Bartley: heart attack, after losing his buy-in at the .50-1 PokerTek
> tables.
>
> Clonie Gowen: suffocation by Vanessa Selbst, after Clonie refused to "make
> it rough on the muff".
>
> Durrr: stabbed to death by Leonard Nimoy, as per William Shatner's orders.
>
> Paul Popinjay: decapitation from Black Helicopter blade, while
> simultaneously O.D.ing from a white widow/2-buck chuck/extenZe "cocktail".
> (Paul's true Trifecta)
>
> Irish Mike: death by internal bleeding, from repeatedly being kicked in
> the balls by Malia and Sasha Obama.
And....
Jennifer Tilley: Expires from the donkey punch delivered by Phil Laak and
he gets a little bit too excited.
Phil Hellmuth: Car wreck while driving to a tournament. He can look into
our souls, but alas, he cannot pierce the defenses of a concrete embankment.
Daniel Negreanu: He actually survives the contract killing, but succumbs to
bad Mexican hair implants after growing weary of his combover.
Mike Caro: Actually, he doesn't die. He just goes on a killing spree after
Phyllis throws Russ G. in his face one time too many.
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Date: 09 Feb 2009 17:13:19
From: Irish Mike
Subject: Re: Poker Players Most Likely to Die in 2009
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"IHeartWuzzy" <a55120d@webnntp.invalid > wrote in message
news:t8j666xnq2.ln2@recgroups.com...
> On Feb 8 2009 11:56 PM, Irish Mike wrote:
>
>> Porsche Dan posted a link
>>
> (http://www.cinemablend.com/celebrity/The-100-Most-Likely-People-To-Die-In-2009-14401.html)
>> to the list of celebrities most likely to die in 2009. He mentioned that
>> Doyle Brunson is #16 on the list. Well I hope nothing happens to Doyle
>> but
>> thought it would be interesting to list the poker players most likely to
>> die
>> in 2009 and their cause of death:
>>
>> Phil Helmuth - stabbed to death with an onion peeler by his psychiatrist
>> wife, who finally snapped.
>>
>> Shieky Shekhan - shot to death by a good Samaritan.
>>
>> Russ G. - sprayed to death by an Orkin technician who mistook him for a
>> giant cockroach.
>>
>> Any one on your list?
>>
>> Irish Mike
>
>
> David Sklansky: shot to death by Natalee Holloway, who finally escaped
> from his basement.
>
> Mike Matusow: death by intestinal bleeding, after a night of "pegging"
> from an Olympic Gardens stripper.
>
> Phil Gordon: strangled by Rafe Furst, after Phil threatened to go public
> about their "relationship".
>
> Daniel Negreanu: contract killing, after charrison hired JBK due to
> "Canadian jealousy".
>
> Antonio Esfandiari: poisoned by Jennifer Tilly, for being so goddamned
> annoying.
>
> Chris "Jesus" Ferguson: struck down by God, for being pickle's and his
> son's imposter.
>
> Aaron Bartley: heart attack, after losing his buy-in at the .50-1 PokerTek
> tables.
>
> Clonie Gowen: suffocation by Vanessa Selbst, after Clonie refused to "make
> it rough on the muff".
>
> Durrr: stabbed to death by Leonard Nimoy, as per William Shatner's orders.
>
> Paul Popinjay: decapitation from Black Helicopter blade, while
> simultaneously O.D.ing from a white widow/2-buck chuck/extenZe "cocktail".
> (Paul's true Trifecta)
>
> Irish Mike: death by internal bleeding, from repeatedly being kicked in
> the balls by Malia and Sasha Obama.
Well bucko, I'm too tolerant to call you a racist red state cracker. But,
Rev'un Sharpton be flyin' to yo crib right now to play da race card on yo
ass.
Irish Mike
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Date: 09 Feb 2009 18:01:17
From: IHeartWuzzy
Subject: Re: Poker Players Most Likely to Die in 2009
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On Feb 9 2009 5:13 PM, Irish Mike wrote:
> "IHeartWuzzy" <a55120d@webnntp.invalid> wrote in message
> news:t8j666xnq2.ln2@recgroups.com...
> > On Feb 8 2009 11:56 PM, Irish Mike wrote:
> > Irish Mike: death by internal bleeding, from repeatedly being kicked in
> > the balls by Malia and Sasha Obama.
>
> Well bucko, I'm too tolerant to call you a racist red state cracker. But,
> Rev'un Sharpton be flyin' to yo crib right now to play da race card on yo
> ass.
>
> Irish Mike
Bending the ol' elbow early, I see...
_____________________________________________________________________
RecGroups : the community-oriented newsreader : www.recgroups.com
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Date: 09 Feb 2009 02:35:13
From: Deadmoney Walking
Subject: Re: Poker Players Most Likely to Die in 2009
|
On Feb 8, 11:56=A0pm, "Irish Mike" <mjos...@ameritech.net > wrote:
> Porsche Dan posted a link
> (http://www.cinemablend.com/celebrity/The-100-Most-Likely-People-To-Di...=
)
> to the list of celebrities most likely to die in 2009. =A0He mentioned th=
at
> Doyle Brunson is #16 on the list. =A0Well I hope nothing happens to Doyle=
but
> thought it would be interesting to list the poker players most likely to =
die
> in 2009 and their cause of death:
>
> Phil Helmuth - stabbed to death with an onion peeler by his psychiatrist
> wife, who finally snapped.
>
> Shieky Shekhan - shot to death by a good Samaritan.
>
> Russ G. - sprayed to death by an Orkin technician who mistook him for a
> giant cockroach.
>
> Any one on your list?
>
> Irish Mike
The TV scooter moron on 4, named "Daryn" who gave me infractions for
asking questions about "Lost" in a OOT thread about Lost, contingent
upon me passing by him on the highway.
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Date: 09 Feb 2009 05:59:38
From: FellKnight
Subject: Re: Poker Players Most Likely to Die in 2009
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On Feb 9 2009 5:35 AM, Deadmoney Walking wrote:
> On Feb 8, 11:56 pm, "Irish Mike" <mjos...@ameritech.net> wrote:
> > Porsche Dan posted a link
> > (http://www.cinemablend.com/celebrity/The-100-Most-Likely-People-To-Di...)
> > to the list of celebrities most likely to die in 2009. He mentioned that
> > Doyle Brunson is #16 on the list. Well I hope nothing happens to Doyle but
> > thought it would be interesting to list the poker players most likely to
die
> > in 2009 and their cause of death:
> >
> > Phil Helmuth - stabbed to death with an onion peeler by his psychiatrist
> > wife, who finally snapped.
> >
> > Shieky Shekhan - shot to death by a good Samaritan.
> >
> > Russ G. - sprayed to death by an Orkin technician who mistook him for a
> > giant cockroach.
> >
> > Any one on your list?
> >
> > Irish Mike
>
> The TV scooter moron on 4, named "Daryn" who gave me infractions for
> asking questions about "Lost" in a OOT thread about Lost, contingent
> upon me passing by him on the highway.
igotskillz?
Fell
--
"Don't underestimate Fell. He's a smart kid."
- Paul Popinjay, RGP, Nov 15, 2008
________________________________________________________________________
: the next generation of web-newsreaders : http://www.recgroups.com
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Date: 08 Feb 2009 22:34:05
From: Porsche_Dan
Subject: Re: Poker Players Most Likely to Die in 2009
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On Feb 8 2009 8:56 PM, Irish Mike wrote:
> Porsche Dan posted a link
>
(http://www.cinemablend.com/celebrity/The-100-Most-Likely-People-To-Die-In-2009-14401.html)
> to the list of celebrities most likely to die in 2009. He mentioned that
> Doyle Brunson is #16 on the list. Well I hope nothing happens to Doyle but
> thought it would be interesting to list the poker players most likely to die
> in 2009 and their cause of death:
>
> Phil Helmuth - stabbed to death with an onion peeler by his psychiatrist
> wife, who finally snapped.
>
> Shieky Shekhan - shot to death by a good Samaritan.
>
> Russ G. - sprayed to death by an Orkin technician who mistook him for a
> giant cockroach.
>
> Any one on your list?
>
> Irish Mike
Just about any online poker pro via euthanasia.
____________________________________________________________________
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Date: 08 Feb 2009 21:16:03
From: WaltWhitman
Subject: Re: Poker Players Most Likely to Die in 2009
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On Feb 8 2009 8:56 PM, Irish Mike wrote:
> Porsche Dan posted a link
>
(http://www.cinemablend.com/celebrity/The-100-Most-Likely-People-To-Die-In-2009-14401.html)
> to the list of celebrities most likely to die in 2009. He mentioned that
> Doyle Brunson is #16 on the list. Well I hope nothing happens to Doyle but
> thought it would be interesting to list the poker players most likely to die
> in 2009 and their cause of death:
>
> Phil Helmuth - stabbed to death with an onion peeler by his psychiatrist
> wife, who finally snapped.
>
> Shieky Shekhan - shot to death by a good Samaritan.
>
> Russ G. - sprayed to death by an Orkin technician who mistook him for a
> giant cockroach.
>
> Any one on your list?
>
> Irish Mike
Sam Grizzle, beat to death by Barbara Enright.
I contradict myself?
Very well then I contradict myself
I am Large
I contain multitudes
________________________________________________________________________
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Date: 08 Feb 2009 21:01:56
From: CheckRazor
Subject: Re: Poker Players Most Likely to Die in 2009
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The Republican party, all fifty five million of you.
Oh wait, that's already happened.
Sorry, my bad. RIP.
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Date: 08 Feb 2009 21:16:14
From: brewmaster
Subject: Re: Poker Players Most Likely to Die in 2009
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On Feb 8 2009 9:01 PM, CheckRazor wrote:
> The Republican party, all fifty five million of you.
> Oh wait, that's already happened.
Yep, you had it, but then your messiah started to come apart at the seams.
Too bad so sad.
>
> Sorry, my bad. RIP.
Brew
--
Email me here: http://tinymail.me/k4r2nk
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