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Date: 31 Dec 2008 07:24:17
From: Senator Millionaire
Subject: Please Add Funny Shit to This Thread
OK, I'll start if off. According to Newt Gingrich's book:

"FEMA spent $67 million on 224.3 million pounds of ice in 2005 for
Katrina victims. It was never delivered. Instead, it was sent to
storage in twenty-two facilities around the country. After two years,
FEMA concluded that the ice was past it's shelf life, and spent
another 3.4 million to melt it."





 
Date: 31 Dec 2008 11:40:22
From: Senator Millionaire
Subject: Re: Please Add Funny Shit to This Thread
A few years ago, I asked a friend from work what the illegal Mexicans
were doing on the roof of the government building. He laughed and
said, "They're replacing the roof with a new one." OK..I laughed and
said, "They just put a new roof on last year!" He laughed again and
said, "I know...that's the third new roof in five years."



 
Date: 31 Dec 2008 08:47:27
From: Lute
Subject: Re: Please Add Funny Shit to This Thread
On Dec 31, 11:38=A0am, Senator Millionaire <moon...@gmail.com > wrote:
> Lute, that was a good one! The fresh paint probably helped to keep the
> dust down...which is always good.

We had a bureaucrat working in the building.
A military officer came in and asked if we were the tech unit.
The bureaucrat said, "No."
The officer was flummoxed. He said, "Well, I thought it was here. I
guess not."
I jumped in and said, "Sir, the tech unit is right there," pointing to
a door easily visible from the bureaucrat's counter, and just a few
steps away.
The officer glared at the bureaucrat. "Why didn't you tell me where
the tech unit is?"
The bureaucrat's answer: "You didn't ask me where it is, you asked me
if this was it."
(I could write a book.)


 
Date: 31 Dec 2008 08:53:21
From: MrBookworm
Subject: Re: Please Add Funny Shit to This Thread
December 19th, 2008 @ 8:06pm
By TERRY KINNEY
Associated Press Writer

CINCINNATI (AP) - Police conclude in a report released Friday that the
fatal fall of an aerial performer during a Christmas pageant was an
accident caused by an equipment failure.


Dean

"First of all, I cannot see Bookworm's post in my newsreader. Probably
just as well, he annoys the fuck out of me anyway." PP - Dec 29, 2008

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Date: 31 Dec 2008 08:55:51
From: CincinnatiKid
Subject: Re: Please Add Funny Shit to This Thread
On Dec 31 2008 11:53 AM, MrBookworm wrote:

> December 19th, 2008 @ 8:06pm
> By TERRY KINNEY
> Associated Press Writer
>
> CINCINNATI (AP) - Police conclude in a report released Friday that the
> fatal fall of an aerial performer during a Christmas pageant was an
> accident caused by an equipment failure.
>
>
> Dean
>
> "First of all, I cannot see Bookworm's post in my newsreader. Probably
> just as well, he annoys the fuck out of me anyway." PP - Dec 29, 2008

Wendy I can flyyyyyyyyyyyy.....splat.

It was a church play, actually.

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Date: 31 Dec 2008 08:38:54
From: Senator Millionaire
Subject: Re: Please Add Funny Shit to This Thread
Lute, that was a good one! The fresh paint probably helped to keep the
dust down...which is always good.





 
Date: 31 Dec 2008 11:15:59
From: NG-USER-777
Subject: Re: Please Add Funny Shit to This Thread
My car was stranded on the side of the freeway. While waiting for a tow
I see a truck with an auger on the back and it digs a hole. A few
minutes later another truck comes by with two men and they shovel the
dirt back in. I ask them wtf is going on and they say "we're on a tree
planting program and the guy that drives the tree truck called off
today." ba-da-ding!


 
Date: 31 Dec 2008 07:51:46
From: Lute
Subject: Re: Please Add Funny Shit to This Thread
On Dec 31, 10:24=A0am, Senator Millionaire <moon...@gmail.com > wrote:
> OK, I'll start if off. According to Newt Gingrich's book:
>
> "FEMA spent $67 million on 224.3 million pounds of ice in 2005 for
> Katrina victims. It was never delivered. Instead, it was sent to
> storage in twenty-two facilities around the country. After two years,
> FEMA concluded that the ice was past it's shelf life, and spent
> another 3.4 million to melt it."

On Dec 31, 10:24 am, Senator Millionaire <moon...@gmail.com > wrote:
> OK, I'll start if off. According to Newt Gingrich's book:
>
> "FEMA spent $67 million on 224.3 million pounds of ice in 2005 for
> Katrina victims. It was never delivered. Instead, it was sent to
> storage in twenty-two facilities around the country. After two years,
> FEMA concluded that the ice was past it's shelf life, and spent
> another 3.4 million to melt it."

While in the armed forces, I worked in a building that was scheduled
to be demolished on a set date.

Then we discovered that, on the DAY BEFORE the scheduled demolition,
the building was scheduled to be painted. Painted.

I brought this to the attention of my commander, believing that the
painting would be cancelled. Of course it would, right?

But it turned out that the office that scheduled the painting had done
so before the bldg had been scheduled for demolition. Contracts had
been signed, and they could not be cancelled.

On May 1 the building received a nice new coat of paint.
On May 2, the building was reduced to the nicest looking pile of
rubble I've ever seen, and trucked away to the dump.

Your hard-earned tax dollars. Because no bureaucrat had the slightest
incentive or inclination to exercise common sense.

And this is only one of many anecdotes I could tell.


  
Date: 31 Dec 2008 09:35:41
From: La Cosa Nostradamus
Subject: Re: Please Add Funny Shit to This Thread
I lived in an army town

A massive hi-tech commisary was built, just weeks before the base closed.
The base was scheduled to close before groundbreaking at the site.


On Dec 31 2008 10:51 AM, Lute wrote:

> On Dec 31, 10:24 am, Senator Millionaire <moon...@gmail.com> wrote:
> > OK, I'll start if off. According to Newt Gingrich's book:
> >
> > "FEMA spent $67 million on 224.3 million pounds of ice in 2005 for
> > Katrina victims. It was never delivered. Instead, it was sent to
> > storage in twenty-two facilities around the country. After two years,
> > FEMA concluded that the ice was past it's shelf life, and spent
> > another 3.4 million to melt it."
>
> On Dec 31, 10:24 am, Senator Millionaire <moon...@gmail.com> wrote:
> > OK, I'll start if off. According to Newt Gingrich's book:
> >
> > "FEMA spent $67 million on 224.3 million pounds of ice in 2005 for
> > Katrina victims. It was never delivered. Instead, it was sent to
> > storage in twenty-two facilities around the country. After two years,
> > FEMA concluded that the ice was past it's shelf life, and spent
> > another 3.4 million to melt it."
>
> While in the armed forces, I worked in a building that was scheduled
> to be demolished on a set date.
>
> Then we discovered that, on the DAY BEFORE the scheduled demolition,
> the building was scheduled to be painted. Painted.
>
> I brought this to the attention of my commander, believing that the
> painting would be cancelled. Of course it would, right?
>
> But it turned out that the office that scheduled the painting had done
> so before the bldg had been scheduled for demolition. Contracts had
> been signed, and they could not be cancelled.
>
> On May 1 the building received a nice new coat of paint.
> On May 2, the building was reduced to the nicest looking pile of
> rubble I've ever seen, and trucked away to the dump.
>
> Your hard-earned tax dollars. Because no bureaucrat had the slightest
> incentive or inclination to exercise common sense.
>
> And this is only one of many anecdotes I could tell.


Atheism is drawing dead

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